


Chance Made Us Neighbours, Hearts Made Us Friends, Ears Made Us Lovers

by gala_apples



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Dirty Talk, Established Relationship, F/M, Fat Thor, M/M, Partner Swapping, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Voyeurism, no body shaming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-25
Updated: 2019-05-25
Packaged: 2020-03-17 08:19:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18961450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gala_apples/pseuds/gala_apples
Summary: Tony Stark and Pepper Potts have been taking a year off from Stark Industries to try to live a 'real life'. Thing is, they're still Tony and Pepper, and that means they'll still make decisions the rest of the world finds suspect.





	Chance Made Us Neighbours, Hearts Made Us Friends, Ears Made Us Lovers

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 'dirty talk' prompt for seasonofkink.
> 
> Literally the only Endgame spoiler is that Thor is fat now, but I figured I'd 'warn' for it anyway. It's a good look on him though, and I had to write it. Bruce is also pictured as Professor Hulk as he can be, without actually being green.

The next time it happens, Tony is ready. Pepper is curled up in the armchair with a head sized thermos of tea. Tony’s on the couch, laptop discarded to another cushion. The tv’s been muted for what seems like hours, but in actuality has been maybe five minutes.

Tony makes eye contact with his beautiful, brilliant, perfect girlfriend. So perfect he agreed to her demand to have a single year of no Stark Industries, no robots, no AI domesticity. He’s been living in a fucking _apartment_ , only one bedroom and one bathroom, like a savage. He’s been working as a mechanic, accounts untouched for two hundred and seventeen days now, or so, who’s counting? Obie’s slowly burning through the inventions Tony’d stockpiled before taking his sabbatical, but the business isn’t taking a hit so they’re both satisfied. 

Tony makes eye contact and says, “we’ve talked it out, Pep. We both wanted it, but now’s when we step up to the plate. Are we doing this?”

She stands up in a fluid motion, the kind of grace she’s had since the day Tony met her. “We are. We can’t keep talking about this, either we do something or get over it. And doing something is more fun.”

They don’t stack the deck. Much. Tony’s just in jeans and a shirt, Pepper’s in a shirt and yoga pants. Tony spritzes on some cologne, Pepper wears a perfume that doesn’t clash but commingle. They’re hot, there’s no question, but it’s not like he’s got a rose between his teeth and she’s in a French Maid’s outfit. They look perfectly normal as they exit their front door and walk six feet down the hall to their neighbour’s door.

Tony starts the knock. He knows this’ll be the hardest part. He’s confident in his ability to bluff and bullshit and gladhand until he gets what he wants and every party comes out of the meeting thinking they’ve got the better end of the stick. It’s the actual physical attracting their neighbours to the door that seems difficult. People in the middle of events don’t like interruptions. He continues knocking as his knuckles start to hurt. He determined to not stop until he’s so annoying his neighbour has no choice but to answer.

Finally, _finally_ Tony hears movement. A shuffle at first, then the clink of the chain lock sliding. Tony considers dropping his hand, but decides to stay consistent and keep knocking all the way until the door is open and his hand is striking nothing midair.

In the doorway stands an intensely ripped, tall white man with glasses and curly hair. He looks like if a basketball player and a bodybuilder and a grizzly bear had a baby, and Tony is into it. He’s not sure if any of Pepper’s exes have looked like this, but speaking for himself, Tony would jump on it. Like he’d literally jump directly onto it, because the guy is wearing only boxer briefs, and the outline is his erection is very noticeable.

“What? Did the Wifi you’ve been stealing go out? I’ll reset it. Do you need a cup of sugar? I will give you five dollars to fuck off to the store down the street. What do you want so fucking badly?”

A guy after Tony’s own heart, being so blunt. He’s an outlier in the world of business, Tony the only guy who’s willing to shake things up, but out here in the real world their instances have been more frequent. 

Tony meets impatience with impatience. “This garbage fire nightmare apartment block has many many faults. One of which is no sound barriers between walls. Me and my girlfriend, we’ve been hearing you and your boyfriend fucking for months now. And if you think about it, you’ve probably been hearing the same, since I’m pretty sure we work on the same shift schedules. Or maybe you thought it was the tv. Anyway, we were hoping you’d like to fuck in the same room?”

The body builder doesn’t immediately smash Tony’s head into the door frame, so that’s a good thing. But he doesn’t say anything either. Time for a second wave of persuasion.

Pepper takes over. “What he means to say is hi! I’m Pepper, this is Tony, and we... actually no, other than no manners Tony’s hit the nail on the head. We can’t get it out of our heads, the sound of you two. We guessed a million times what you’d look like, and where your hands were, and if you kissed afterwards. We want to see, if you’re up for trying.”

“Thor! Hey, Thor?” the brunet calls. The few steps he takes as he twists backward allow Tony his first glance of this apartment’s decoration. There seem to be a lot of tapestries hung.

Out from the bathroom springs a solid looking blond holding a knife in one hand, and his phone in the other, no doubt cued to 911. Despite not wanting to get shanked, a large portion of Tony’s mind is focused on how sexy Thor is. He’s got long hair, braided and styled and only a bit mussed from being in bed. He’s also got soft pecs and a beer gut. Tony’s dated more than his fair share of models, with the size zero that implies, but he’s never been one to body shame, and he sure the fuck isn’t less attracted now that he’s seen Thor in the flesh. Mostly he just wants to sink his hands in that pretty hair and see how his skin compresses under his fingers.

“No, it’s okay. I don’t think they’re dangerous. Just, uh. Just come over so we can all talk clearly, okay?”

Thor puts the knife on the top of a bookshelf. He crosses his arms over his rounded chest, expression untrusting as the body builder lets them in. Tony wonders if he’s been burgled before or something, to be so edgy. It’s okay. He’s in the arms and munitions business, he can handle himself a paranoid man.

“I’m Tony.” Usually he’d be flashing his last name too, make it clear with one syllable he was a man to be reckoned with. But even in this moment he stays true to his promise to Pepper for a year off from the flash and fireworks, and doesn’t invoke his Thirty Under Thirty status. “This is Pepper. We are summarily interested in the awesome sex you were just having, I think Thor said ‘right there, fuck me right there’? That sounded like a pretty important spot, Pep and I were wondering what the spot was. We’d like to negotiate something between same room voyeurism and full on orgy?”

“Bruce?” Thor asks.

“You’ve told me enough stories about Asgard to know you miss the wild times-”

“This is not necess-”

“I know it’s not. But it would be fun, wouldn’t it?”

Thor expresses his thanks in the form of a kiss. It’s a full, deep, mouth searching kiss, and sure enough, Bruce’s fingers curl into Thor’s hair. Tony can’t really be surprised, in the last few months there have been multiple pleas to pull on hair. What he can be is pleased to finally see it.

“I don’t really know the etiquette of this. Is it cool to call dibs on Pepper?”

Before Tony can make a quip about manners being for jerks, and before Pepper can say what Tony’s pretty sure she’s gonna say, that she’d be happy to fool around with this sexy Viking, Bruce actually snorts excessively. Tony can’t help but look at him, and he knows without glancing at Pepper that she’s wearing her patented eyebrowed raised ‘explain why I’m not offended’ expression.

“Not like that,” Bruce says defensively. “I know you don’t know him, but if there’s ever been a man less likely to not know the etiquette of group sex, it’s my fiance.”

“Only with friends!” Thor protests on mostly deaf ears. At least, no one responds to the interjection, even if it fills Tony’s mind with images of multiple thick Viking cosplayers all getting down on each other in a pile of flesh. Hot.

Pepper shrugs. “Or mine. Tony’s never been to Asgard, where ever that is, but he did fuck all the girls on the Playboy calendar, and it did not take twelve meetings.”

“Yes, yes,” Tony says dismissively. “I’m a slut, Thor’s a slut, we’re both awesome, enough compliments. Now Bruce, do you want to fuck? Are you down with Thor’s swapping concept? Or do you want to try a side by side type of deal?”

“If we fuck, Tony, you’re going to come so hard you temporarily go blind. Are you ready for that?”

“I’ve been listening to you narrate your fucking for eons now, hell yes I’m ready for you to pound me stupid. And that’s saying something, I’m a MENSA level genius.”

“Him too,” Thor throws in, happy grin not taking away from the sincerity.

“Hot,” Tony informs the room, before moving in for the kill. He stands on his tip toes for their first kiss, and when that doesn’t quite get him there, he has no qualms about wrapping both his legs around Bruce’s waist. It’s not like the man doesn’t have the strength to hold him up. From the looks of him, he could probably hold up a Tony on each individual finger.

It doesn’t take long for things to get steamy. It would be downright disappointing if it did, frankly. You don’t proposition an orgy and then go on seventeen dates first. Tony’s glad that in a matter of minutes they’re all naked in the massive bed that takes up the entire bedroom, positioned in truly interesting ways. Tony’s been around the sex block a few hundred thousand times, and anything happening for the less than fifth time he considers unique. This is some good shit, here.

Pepper’s on her back with her left leg on Thor’s shoulder and her right curled around his thigh. Thor is kneeling, fucking into her in a way that Tony can tell is deep. Even if he didn’t have an engineer’s brain, the filthy words spewing from both their mouths, Pepper’s ‘fuck me like a king’ and Thor’s ‘take it all, take it’, would make it obvious. Tony mentally crosses his fingers for Pepper’s sake, wishing her multiple g-spot orgasms, then refocuses on what Bruce is doing.

Because the thing is, Bruce is doing a lot. They’re sitting facing each other, Bruce’s legs out in a V, Tony’s legs straight up culminating in his ankles on Bruce’s shoulders. The position necessitates their arms locked behind their backs as braces, but the angle of penetration is worth not being able to touch Bruce. Tony rocks forward to meet Bruce’s thrusts, Bruce rocks forward _to_ thrust, and Tony’s pretty sure his eyes are crossing. His prostate is taking a beating, and what more could Tony ask for on a Thursday night? Except maybe for this to be happening before eleven pm, when he has to open the shop at six, but that’s future Tony’s problem. 

Tony’s never had such talkative sex before. He’s a talker, of course, born spouting bullshit, and sure Pepper and the occasional hook up prior to her have met his match in that regard. But this is Tony’s first orgy in which every member has a constant stream of things to say. It’s a breathy, gasping, moaning room of ‘fuck me’ and ‘you’re so hot’ and ‘harder’ and ‘faster’, and Tony wishes for a moment he was at home, in Stark Tower, getting JARVIS to record this audio. But if he was, then he wouldn’t actually have this, would he? Definitely not Bruce and Thor, and probably not Pepper either, if he’d disrespected her one request of a year off.

Tony already knows Bruce and Thor are loud orgasmers. He’s known that for a while, much longer than he’s known their names or what they look like. Tony’s been in situations where he’s had to muffle himself; primarily occasions of public sex, but thankfully this is not one. When Bruce slams the spunk out of him, arcing it high in the air before it splatters across Tony’s chest, Tony shouts out something like “fucking love you” before his arms waver and he collapses backwards. 

Not for long though. Bruce uses his superior strength to pull Tony back up and hold his weight entirely as he rocks him on his cock. Tony’s nothing more than a sleeve for Bruce to fuck into, and it’s maddeningly hot, if a little degrading. Kind of the perfect combination, in Tony’s book. It’s made all the better by Thor growling at Pepper that he’s going to fill her with come, and yeah, he’s wearing a condom and they all know it, but that doesn’t stop Pepper from screeching as she tenses around his huge cock and comes in a flood of slick. 

The funny thing is how chill it is afterwards. Tony prides himself in not regretting his choices, ever, but there’s no denying that some of his choices lead to awkward moments. This though is oddly awkward-free. Once they all uncouple and have gotten redressed, Bruce offers them some steeped fruit tea, which Tony denies and Pepper unsurprisingly accepts, promising to return the mug the next day. 

Tony’s got one hand on the doorknob when he decides to throw something out without consulting Pepper. Hopefully she won’t be offended. Pissed he can deal with, but not hurt. “You ever hear us doing something interesting, feel free to knock.”

Thor nods, beautiful braided hair swaying. “You too.”

In the hallway Pepper’s reaction is merely, “you mean that?”

“I mean, I don’t want to be _open_ -open. I love you so much I gave up my lab, okay? How is that not more of a message than a ring? I’m just saying, that was fun. We like fun, don’t we?”

Pepper laughs. “You have the morals of a tire fire. Wanna go have a shower with me before the spermicide gives me a yeast infection?”

Tony will never in his life turn down a shower with Pepper Potts, the most stunning woman the world over. “You should also piss. UTIs suck.”

Pepper drapes her head on Tony’s shoulder as he works the key in the doorknob. “I love you, Tony Stark.”

“You too, Pep.”


End file.
